


Ai Gonplei Nou Ste Odon

by QueerSponge



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Canon divergent after 3x07, Clarke doesn't know, F/F, Happy Ending, Lexa's Not Dead, Smut, There are no chips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-09
Updated: 2017-03-09
Packaged: 2018-10-01 13:51:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10191335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueerSponge/pseuds/QueerSponge
Summary: Lexa survived the shooting.Clarke doesn't know.She's about to find out.





	1. May we meet again

**Author's Note:**

> The chips are not an issue in this story, I think we can safely say that storyline is dead and buried.

_You were right, Clarke. Life is about more than just surviving._

_In peace may you leave the shore, in love, may you find the next. Save passage on your travels, until our final journey on the ground._

_May we meet again._

\-----------------------------------

Lexa finds comfort in the those words, see’s Clarke’s face through hooded lids as tears stream down her pale cheeks. As she leans over to kiss her for the last time.

For many years Lexa had known her rein would be ended by the hands of another, through war or assassination, she knew that after Costia’s death she would not find love again. She would die, and she would die alone, she had accepted that many years ago, she was at peace with it.

Until Clarke Griffin fell from the sky. 

Clarke Griffin. Skai Prisa. Wanheda. _Clarke._ The girl who’s hair shone like the sun and who’s eyes were bluer than the bluest oceans. _Clarke._ Who argued with passion and fire. _Clarke._ Who kissed her back softly, slowly, in her war tent after telling Lexa that life was about more than just surviving. _Clarke._ Who held a knife to her throat with tears in her eyes. _Clarke._ Who re-bandaged her hand so tenderly after her fight with Roan. _Clarke._ Who kissed her before laying her softly in her bed furs. _Clarke._ Who made love to her with tenderness and passion. _Clarke._ The girl she _loved._

So, as she feels the soft press of tear soaked lips, of a shuddering breath, she lets go. Her fight is over.

\-----------------------------------

Salt.

That was the first thing to register when she regains consciousness. The air smells salty, and fresh, and cold. Opening her eyes she squints at the sharp light coming from a small circular window above her head. She squints in confusion as she looks around the unfamiliar room.

There is a small table at the other side of the room with a half empty glass of water and a book laid open and face down on it’s tattered wooden surface. There’s a small wooden chair next to the table and a large metal door not 3 feet from where she is currently laying. Slowly, she lifts herself up on stiff muscles into a sitting position, leaning heavily against the chipped painted wall behind her. She winces at the cold against her back, only now noticing that she was only wearing a band of fabric around her chest and her underwear.

Not fully understanding what is going on she shifts her body, slowly, so she can put her feet on the cold floor. With a strength she didn’t know she would need for such a simple task, she pushed herself up into a standing position, swaying as all the blood rushed to her head. Walking over to the table, she grabs the glass of water and downs it in one, fresh, her mind supplies as she puts the glass down and picks up the open book, twenty thousand leagues under the sea she reads from the old worn cover.

As she puts the book back down she hears the squeak of the large metal door opening, quickly looking around for a weapon to defend herself with, deciding she doesn’t have the strength in her weakened and confused state to lift the chair, she settles on the now empty glass of water.

Looking as intimidating as one can wearing next to nothing, her curls matted to the back of her head and wielding an empty glass of water, she stands as straight as her tired muscles will allow.

Her shoulders sag in relief when she see’s a curly head of brown hair and a face of dark freckles.

“Luna” she whispers as she watches the woman take in the now empty bed.

Luna spins around, a smile lighting up her face as she crosses the small room to stand in front of the tired brunette. 

“You’re awake, you shouldn’t be walking, your muscles are still weak” she supplies as she helps Lexa take a seat on the wooden chair behind her. Relieved to no longer be standing on aching legs, Lexa takes the time to take in her old friend. Her eyes still as kind as she remembers, only a little older since their last meeting.

She takes a deep breath, to rid herself of the dizzy haze that has clouded her head from the short walk across the room.

“What happened Luna?” she whispers confused. Luna kneels in front of the injured Commander and places her hand on Lexa’s.

“I do not know everything that happened in Polis. Indra turned up at our shores looking for our healer, Linus.” She paused “She knew that he was one of the best healers in the land, he has taught many healers in his time on this earth, and clearly he proved her right. He removed the bullet, we used some of my blood to stop you from bleeding too much. Though Linus removed the bullet and closed the wound you did not wake up for many moons. We decided to keep you here, under Indra’s orders, until your soul decided whether or not it was ready to move on. Indra was adamant that your fight was not over.” Luna rubbed her face as she recalled her and Indra’s last meeting. “She returned to Polis six moons after Linus treated you, I am to send word to her when there is news of your change in health”. She looked up at her fair skinned friend, watching her process the information.

Lexa, to her credit, did not let Luna see the confusion and anguish she was feeling. She was working everything out in her head, after a couple of minutes of silence the Commander asked Luna a question she was not sure she would be able to answer.

“Do you know of the Skai Kru?” Luna nodded her head, yes. “Do you know of Clarke Griffin? She was with me when I was shot, did she come with Indra?” she asked hopefully.

The sigh Luna expelled caused a sigh of her own to get lodged in her throat.

“Indra told me that Clarke was special to you, and that if you awoke you would ask for her.” she pauses. “Indra stole your body from the resting stone when she felt your weakened pulse, she did not trust Titus anymore and she Clarke had already fled. She carried you out through the tunnels and brought you here. From my last communication with Indra I was informed that Aden was standing in until your body was recovered, As you know there cannot be a Conlave without the body of the previous Commander. Only Aden and Indra know of your whereabouts. As you know Lexa, a new conclave cannot begin without the body of the previous Commander. So, I’m sorry Lexa, but Clarke does not know you are alive.”

Lexa blinked back the tears she could feel building in her still tired eyes. _Clarke thinks i’m dead_ , she let out a whimper as she drops her head into her hands. She pushes her palms into her eye sockets, trying to hold herself together and stop the tears that so desperately want to fall. She took a deep breath and looked at her old friend.

“Thank you for everything you have done for me my friend, I could never repay you”. she started, but was interrupted when Luna shook her head, a sad smile on her face.

“After you saved my life at the Conclave” she whispered “There is nothing I would not do for you my friend.” she smiled softly.

“Be that as it may” Lexa began. “I am more grateful than you will ever know.” She paused. “I need you to send word to Indra, let her know that I am awake and that I would like to speak to her.” she breathes out, her exhaustion beginning to catch up with her, she knew she needed to rest.

“How long?” She asked. Luna tilted her head in confusion until she understood Lexa’s question. 

She bowed her head and whispered regretfully “Five weeks”. She watched as the normally stoic Commander let the tears fall down her cheeks. She helps her up out of the chair and slowly walks her over to the bed, rubbing her back in smooth motions as she gets her tears under control. _Clarke things i've been dead for five weeks!_ Lexa things as she sits heavily on the bed. She lays down, pulling the blankets around her exhausted body, sitting on the edge of the bed, Luna watches as her friends eyelids fluttered shut.

“Rest, Lexa” she whispers “Your muscles are still weak. I will send word to Indra, try to get some sleep.” she finishes as she gets up and walks to the still open door, softly closing it behind her.

Lexa lays in the bed, emotional and physical exhaustion forcing her eyelids to flutter closed, she dreams of blue eyes and golden hair.

//

Hearing muffled voices from the other side of the door, Lexa pushes herself up into a seated position, already getting used to the effort it takes to do so. She grabs the glass of water and dried meat from the small table, now pulled next to her bed. She drinks the water in one and takes slow bites of food, wincing at the soreness in her throat as she does so.

She watches the door calmly as two figures enter.

“Heda.” is whispered as Indra makes her way into the room.

She walks over to the brunette still sitting on the bed and offers her forearm for Lexa to grasp. Lexa does not miss the moisture in the warriors eyes as the greet each other.

“It is good to see you, Heda” Indra says.

“Mochof, Indra. Mochof.“ her voice breaking as the gratitude of her words weigh her down “Thank you for bringing me here, for saving me.” she whispers, looking up at her most trusted friend. “Tell me Indra, what is the state of Arkadia, of Clarke.” she asks.

“Pike has fallen Heda.” is said with confidence and Lexa lets out a relieved sigh, she nods for the warrior to continue. “The people of Arkadia over threw him, I do not know a great deal, all i know is that the people of Arkadia turned against him.”

Lexa nods her head as she takes everything in, “What of Clarke, Indra?” she asks her friend. 

The warrior shifts awkwardly from foot to foot, lifting her gaze from her Commander. Lexa notices the shift in Indra and asks again, with more authority. 

“Indra. Where. Is. Clarke?” she asks through snarl.

Indra looks back at Lexa, an apology in her gaze. “I do not know, Heda. A number of moons after Pike was over turned, and the barricade was lifted, she was seen leaving Arkadia. No-one has seen her since.” She kneels in front of the distraught brunette. “Aden has placed a reward for word of her whereabouts, she is to be brought in unharmed, Heda. He promised he would make sure she is safe, for you, Heda.”

The knowledge that Aden has stayed true to his word, that he will protect Clarke and by association Skai Kru warms Lexa’s heart. But the sinking feeling in her gut at the thought of Clarke out in the woods, alone, fending for herself, grieving Lexa’s death, makes her grip the edge of the bed with weak hands.

“I need to find her Indra, we must leave now.” she says determined.

Indra spares a look at Luna, almost forgotten in the corner of the room. Luna takes a step forward, her hands held calmly behind her back. 

“We will help Lexa, but we cannot let you leave yet.” she starts “Your body is still weak. We have been feeding you through a tube in your unconscious state but you still need more food to get your strength back.” she finishes, growing increasingly uncomfortable under Lexa’s hardened stare. 

“It should take around eight to ten moons for you to regain your full strength” Indra continues for Luna. “Then I will take you back to Polis” she confirms, “You can return as Heda, Aden is the only one who knows of your state and your whereabouts.” she finishes.

As much as Lexa wants to leave now, she realises that she is no good to anyone in her current state. The Ambassadors will see her unfit to lead if she turns up in Polis barely able to hold herself up. So she sighs, nods her head in confirmation to Indra’s words, and stands from the bed. With hands placed calmly behind her back as she slowly walks around the small room, determined to start on getting her muscles back into full working order, and begins to speak.

“I will accept these terms, Indra” she says with a nod at the warrior, noticing the not-so-subtle sigh of relief Indra produced. “Though let it be clear.” she says with conviction, causing the warrior to stand, head bowed. “This will be the last time you order me to do anything, do you understand? Do not think me weak.” she says, her usually Commander confidence showing through.

“Of course, Heda.” she says, bowing her head again in respect.

“Now.” Lexa says. “Let us begin.”

//

Indra stays with Lexa, helps her work her still weak muscles, helps her to regain the strength she lost in the weeks of unconsciousness. She eats hearty meals of fish and water, under the close eye of Luna, and after four moons, she feels she is not far from being in an acceptable state to leave.

Indra agrees, which is why, just seven moons after Luna first came to her room, she finds herself on the dry shore, arm grasped firmly in Luna’s. 

“Goodbye, my friend. I will not forgot what you have done for me.” she says, her Commander mask in place, her hand resting on the handle of her sheathed sword, but Luna has known Lexa many, many years. She knows the sincerity and affection Lexa is hiding behind her well practiced mask.

She squeezes the arm in hers and nods her head. “Send word when you have found your Skai Prisa, Heda. I would like to meet her.” she says with a twinkle in her eye.

The quirk of pink lips and the nod of a head let’s Luna know that she will most certainly be back, and hopefully, not alone.

“May we meet again, Luna” she says, and with one last nod to her friend, she mounts her horse, brought to the shore by Indra, and they begin their ride back to Polis.

//

They arrive under the cover of darkness.

They make swift work of moving through the city, unseen by sleeping eyes as they make their way to Polis tower. Lexa takes a moment to look up at the tower, her home, believing she would never lay eyes upon it again. She lets a small smile break out on her face, hidden by the darkness. Indra enters first, informing the guards controlling the elevator of the Commanders presence. Their eyes widen is surprise as they lower their heads in her respect. “Heda” they whisper, opening the doors and motioning for Lexa to step inside, she does so with Indra at her side and with a nod to the guards she hears the familiar groan of the gears as the elevator ascends.

The guards at the entrance to the throne room are equally as surprised, though hide it under their dark hoods, as they open the doors for Lexa to enter, she hears the brief whisper of _Heda_ as she passes through the threshold.

She stops in front of the throne, a lone small figure sitting on its fur covered seat.

“Lexa” says the voice from the throne, laced with affection. “I am glad to see you are well, Heda” he says as he stands from the throne. He walks over to his mentor and takes a knee in front of her. “It was an honour to hold your throne until your return.”

Lexa places a hand on his shoulder “I would not wish for anyone to have held my throne but you” she says thankfully. “What of Clarke, Aden, have you found her?” she asks.

Aden shakes his head “I have not Heda, the only word is possible sightings that have come to nothing. All these sightings have come from Trikru woods, I believe, Heda, that the frequency and the location imply that this is where she is hiding.” he says. “I was sent word that Clarke left Arkadia once the barricade had been lifted, that was eight moons ago Heda.” he says. 

“Thank you Aden” Lexa says with a nod. “Let us sleep, I will call for a meeting with the Ambassadors in the morning”. She lets her hand fall from his shoulder as the both leave the throne room, making their way to their separate quarters. As she begins to change into her night clothes she walks over to the long mirror opposite her bed, she lifts her night shirt and examines the flesh under her fingertips, a small puckered scar, stark white against her tanned skin. She inhales a shaky breath as she remembers frantic pale hands holding blood soaked rags to cover the hole, I frantic yet beautiful face staring down at her. She blinks back the tears, threatening to make their way down her cheek and moves away from the mirror. She pauses, as she looks upon her bed, the sheets still rumpled from their love making. She slips under the cold sheets, pulling them up tightly around her body and breaths in the lingering scents of her, of Clarke. With a breath she settles into the soft mattress and sleeps.

//

The shock on the Ambassadors faces as they see her sat atop of her throne is not unexpected.

However the warm welcome she receives from them certainly is, their apparent dissatisfaction of her decisions before her accident seemingly forgotten. She is greeted with warm welcomes and praises for her recovery.

Speaking to the Ambassadors she discovers that Chanellor Kane was appointed the new leader of the Skai Kru, after Pike’s rein was ended. His first task as Chancellor was to prove to the other clans that they could be trusted within the alliance, by placing all of their guns in a locked chest outside of Arkadia as a gesture of good will. This is what led to Aden and the Ambassadors agreeing for the barricade to be lifted. 

It was three moons later that Clarke was spotted leaving Arkadia alone, a simple bag on her back.

After the fall of Pike, the Ambassadors agreed that there was no threat to Polis, Azgeda had retreated back to the North with King Roan and Arkadia was in a state of peace. Lexa believed that this was the best and safest time to set out looking for Clarke, she informed the Ambassadors of her decision and was surprised to be met with agreement, the Ambassadors had been informed of Clarke’s role in trying to save the Commander from Titus, who was locked in the prison below Polis tower, turning himself in as soon as Lexa’s body was discovered missing.

The Ambassadors agreed to maintain peace while she was gone. She readied her horse, accompanied by Indra, and set off for the last place Clarke was spotted.

_I’m coming Clarke, i'm coming._


	2. Life is about more than just surviving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa reunite, the mature rating is for this chapter.

Clarke had to leave Arkadia, she knew that, her friends knew it too.

They had seen her when she’d crawled out of the air vent that led to the medical bay, had seen Octavia lift her off the floor as if she was just an empty body and sit her at her mothers work desk. Watched her as she stared, tears streaming down her cheeks, as Octavia had explained what happened. The barricade. The shooting. Lexa’s Death. She explained how she broke into Clarke's bedroom, all but carrying her to her horse. Riding back to Arkadia as fast as they could. 

Watched as Abby knelt in front of Clarke, watched as Clarke’s eyes focused on her mother, as she whispered ‘she’s gone’ over and over as she fell into her, sobbing the words into her mothers neck. Watched as Abby told Octavia to carry her over the sink, as Clarke stood motionless as her mother scrubbed at her hands, washing the black blood from her daughters skin. Watched as Abby laid her on one of the beds, as she brushed the hair from her face and spoke to her in whispers, told her she was going to be okay. Even if none of them believed it.

They watched as she visibly shook herself out of the grieving haze she had been under for days, watched as she spoke to the people of Arkadia, to her people. Watched as she changed the minds of frightened citizens, as they agreed on a proper election. Watched as Kane was elected as leader of her people, as Pike was imprisoned for his crimes against the 300 Trikru warriors. Watched her as she spoke to Kane, as she told him, with staggered breath, of the peace Lexa fought for, that she died for. Watched as she and Kane decided that locking the weapons on the outside of Arkadia would be a step towards showing the rest of the clans they meant peace. Watched as the barricade was lifted. Watched as Clarke packed.

They watched as Clarke spoke to her mother, told her she needed to be alone, needed her time to grieve for Lexa, for the love they had only briefly encountered together. They watched as she hugged each of them goodbye, promising they would meet again. They watched as she walked out the gates of Arkadia. Watched until they could watch her no more.

//

The first day she searched for a place to camp.

She found a clean water source, not ten minutes walk from a small cave covered with hanging ivy. She set traps, like Lexa had shown her, a stark contrast to her time in the woods after Mount Weather. Back then she had no knowledge of the woods, no desire to survive. This time she used everything Lexa had taught her. She ate the meat she had caught and cooked over a small fire, she cried during the day and dreamt of her at night. She walked the TriKru woods, imagining Lexa playing in them as a child. 

For days she did the same, trying to be as close to Lexa as she ever would be again. At night she would let herself dream of a future where Lexa was alive, where they made love as tenderly as they did on that fateful day, allowed herself to imagine a world where they grew old together, where life really was about more than just surviving. On other nights those words haunted her, the last words she would ever hear in the voice of the woman she loved, those we the nights she woke with tears streaming down her face.

She needed this.

She needed to grieve for Lexa, for them, for their future. She needed to be alone, she needed to be with the trees in Lexa’s forest.

She had encountered few people as she walked the forests, had heard that the acting Heda was looking for her. She smiled, when she heard Aden’s name. She knew Lexa would have been proud. She knew she was not in danger. Still, she let them see her as she walked through the woods, not a threat, just grieving.

She would stay until she had a reason to leave.

//

After a couple of days she opened her bag and pulled out the pencils and paper she had taken from her mothers desk. She sat for hours in the sunlight, drawing Lexa from memory, putting down on paper everything she could remember of the woman she loved. She drew picture after picture as her eyes welled with tears, she drew until her fingers hurt, until she got Lexa’s eyes just right.

Then she drew her hands, the calloused skin, the long fingers, the way they held a sword with such strength and skill yet held Clarke with such tenderness.

It helped, drawing her thoughts, her memories, helped her to remember, helped her to ensure she would never forget. Gave her the comfort that in years to come, as her memories fade, that she would have this, this proof that Lexa was real, that she was important, that she was loved.

And so, she stayed, she walked and she drew, she stayed, as there was no reason to leave.

———————————————————————————-

Lexa and Indra rode to a small village in the heart of the Trikru woods, spoke to villagers both young and old. The villagers who had sent word of sightings of Wanheda. Lexa spoke to them kindly, accepted their offerings of food and water. She told Indra to stay with the villagers, she was going out alone.

Indra protested at first, assuring the Commander that she would need the protection, that she was not at full strength yet. Lexa simply shook her head and thanked her friend, tied the dried meats the villagers had gifted her onto her sack, threw it over her shoulder and set off on foot in search of Clarke.

She walked for many hours until she decided to retire for the night, knowing she needed to keep her strength up. She made a fire, ate the dried meats and slept. She slept, and she dreamt of Clarke.

Three days and no luck, but she didn't give up hope.

Clarke was here and she would find her.

After three days of searching she came up a cav, the entrance hidden behind an ivy curtain.

She reached for the ivy, intending to pull it back to take a look inside the cave when suddenly the ivy curtain was pushed aside, the shocked face of the woman she is looking for staring back at her with wide eyes.

"Lexa?" is breathed out, and all she can do is stare.

\-----------------------------------------------------------

Clarke can feel the heat of the morning sun slipping through the curtain of ivy covering her temporary home. 

Standing on tired legs she walks to the entrance, ready to take her morning wash, but as she pulls the curtain aside she stops with a gasp when she realizes there is someone on the other side. She jumps back in surprise and shock as she takes in the equally shocked face of the woman in front of her.

"Lexa?" she whispers, confusion overtaking her features.

Lexa watches as Clarke lifts a hand to her mouth, choking back a sob.

"L-Lexa, is that you?" She doesn't wait for an answer as she moves forward, wrapping her arms around Lexa's neck, sobbing.

Lexa, still too stunned to say anything, winds her arms around Clarke’s waist, squeezing her tightly and letting relieved tears fall. 

"It's me, niron, it's me" she says as she breaths in the scent of Clarke. Clarke, who she thought she said goodbye to so many moons ago. "I'm okay" she whispers over and over again as Clarke's knees give out and they sink to the floor. "Ai gonplei nou ste odon, Clarke".

She holds Clarke until her breathing slows, she holds Clarke, and she smiles.

//

Clarke is the first to pull back, her mind not quite registering what is happening, “H-How?” she sobs, the tears streaming down her face and coating her quivering lips. “How is this real?” she whimpers, moving the back of her hand to hers lips, trying and failing to calm herself down.

“Indra” Lexa begins, lifting a hand to brush a blonde streak of hair from Clarke’s face. “She removed my body from the resting stone, she said I was was almost dead, she carried me through the tunnels, took me to Luna’s healer.” she whispers, tears still silently falling. “I woke up eight moons ago on Luna’s rig.”

Clarke shakes her head in confusion “But how? I watched you die, you had no pulse.” she sobs. “I watched Titus remove the chip from yo-“ she gasps. “The chip! It must have sparked when he removed it, it must have sent a shock to your heart, that must have been how Indra found a pulse!” she says to herself.

Lexa watches as Clarke laughs, loud and beautiful, she laughs and she laughs and she sobs and she pulls Lexa into her, brushing their lips together as she laughs and sobs into Lexa’s tear stained mouth. “You’re alive” she whispers “Yu gonplei nou ste odon” she laughs happily, so overwhelmed.

And Lexa laughs back, laughs as she cries into Clarke’s mouth, cries for the future she thought she'd lost and laughs for the future she will have.

Clarke kisses her softly once more before pulling back, lifting her hands to cup Lexa’s face. Smiling softly as her bottom lip wobbles, her eyes roam over Lexa’s face, her high cheek bones, her green eyes. Clarke believed with unwavering certainty, that she would never see this face again, the face of the woman she loves, would never get to touch soft cheeks, to run her thumb against trembling lips, to gaze into those beautiful green eyes. She sobs again as she leans their foreheads together, feeling Lexa move a hand to cup the back of her neck. “Ai hod yu in, Clarke” she feels whispered against her lips. “I love you”.

And Clarke laughs again, mixed with a sob “I love you too Lexa” she says “I love you so much”.

Lexa releases a shuddering sigh of relief as she leans in and connects their lips again, releasing a sigh of pure happiness from Clarke and another bout of laughter. “Stop laughing” she says through a laugh “I can’t kiss you properly” she laughs. They both dissolve into laughter, holding onto each other, touching fingertips to tear stained cheeks, running hands through each others hair. Just touching, getting reacquainted with skin they never thought they would touch again.

“I’m happy” Clarke whispers when they pull back to look at each other, “I’m just so happy” she whispers.

Lexa moves them back into the cave, lying down on Clarke’s blanket with the blonde immediately cuddling into her side, laying her head on her chest. Clarke pulls the blanket around them as they snuggle down together, eyelids fluttering closed with the emotional exhaustion of their reunion.

“Sleep now, niron” she says as she places a kiss to Clarke’s head, pulling the blanket tighter around them “I will still be here when you wake”.

With that the two woman faded into slumber, feeling happier than they ever believed possible.

//

Lexa is awoken by the feel of hands stroking over her stomach, she groans as she tries to wake herself fully, grabbing a hold of the roaming hand as she laces their fingers together, her eyes fluttering open when she feels a soft kiss being pressed to her forehead.

“Mmmmm” she murmurs as Clarke continues to pepper her head with soft kisses. “Clarke?” she mumbles.

When she opens her eyes she is greeted with a teary smile, she smiles in response, lifting their entwined hands to her lips and pressing a soft kiss to Clarke’s palm.

"I still can't believe this is real, that you're here, that you're alive!" Clarke whispered, stroking her thumb along the back of Lexa's hand.

Lexa smiles at Clarke, a bright smile as she rolls on her side to face the blonde, noses brushing. "After Costia's death, after I was called to lead my people." she starts, lifting a hand to stroke down Clarke's face, her nose, her lips. "I had accepted that I would die alone. That was my destiny. I was called to lead my people and I would lead them until I die." she breathed out. "But then you fell from the sky" she says as she rubs away the tear that falls down her lovers cheek. "You fell from the sky and you lit a fire inside me. Not of anger or of victory, but of love." she says leaning forwards to kiss Clarke's quivering lips. "So when the time came, when my fight was over." Clarke gasps out a sob in response and Lexa feels tears slip down her own cheeks. "I was at peace, because in all my years as Commander, I never imagined I would die starring into the eyes of the woman I loved." she cried. "But now that i'm here with you, I cannot imagine the pain I would feel if I had to watch y...yo-." she cries as she pulls the blonde into a messy kiss. "I'm sorry that I left you, Clarke" she whispers against sobbing lips. "I will not take this second chance for granted, niron." she cries when she feels Clarke nod against her lips. "I will love you with everything I am, until my last breath. Hopefully many years from now when we are both old and grey" she laughs, kissing Clarke more firmly.

They stay like that for hours, kissing, touching, planning a future that neither believed they would get the chance to live.

//

It is after hours and laying together, kissing, talking when Clarke leans over Lexa and whispers “I love you.” against kiss bruised lips. “So much.” She says as she stokes her hand down Lexa’s abdomen, “and I want to show you.” She said as her hand drifted lower, under the bottom of Lexa’s loose shirt. She pulled the shirt up past Lexa’s ribs, leaning down to kiss the newly uncovered skin, peppering soft kisses around Lexa’s belly button, slowly moving her lips upwards. “I never imagined I wou-” she stops suddenly, releasing a shaky breath as her lips hover over the white puckered scar. She touches it with her fingers, whimpers when she thinks back to the last time her hands were on Lexa’s stomach, her hands covered in blood. Lexa feels Clarke pause, looks down when she feels soft fingers touching her fresh scar and tears dripping onto her skin. She cups Clarke’s face with both hands and pulls her up, so they are face to face, lips almost touching.

“It’s okay Clarke, I’m here, I’m alive.” she brings their lips together, “I came back for you niron” she whispers against Clarke's mouth. Clarke whimpers as she slides her lips more firmly over Lexa’s, swinging her left leg over to straddle the brunettes stomach. She feels Lexa’s hands sliding down her waist, gripping her hips as she slides her tongue past Clarke’s lips, who groans at the unexpected contact as she rubs her tongue softly against Lexa’s, sliding her arms up and around her neck. They stay like that for what feels like hours, getting reacquainted with lips they never thought they’d touch again. Clarke begins a slow grind of her hips, needing to be as close to Lexa as possible, needing to show her how much she missed her, how much she loves her. Lexa groans are tilts her head to the side kissing Clarke deeper and slower, sliding her tongue against Clarke’s and then retreating to suck on a plump lower lip. She grazes the kiss bruised lips with her teeth pulling a whimper from the blonde above her.

With a quick tilt of her hips Lexa flips Clarke onto her back, settling down between her open legs, grinding into her as she moves her mouth from kiss bruised lips, sliding them across a pale neck, feeling the vibrations of Clarke’s whimpers through her lips as she grinds harder into her.

“Lexa” Clarke whimpers, fingers grasping Lexa’s braided hair and dragging her back up to her lips. Her mouth opens instantly as they kiss messy and slow, both girls overwhelmed with the emotion of getting to touch the other again. It is Lexa’s turn to whimper when she feels Clarke start a slow grind up into her stomach, slides her hands down Lexa’s back, pulling at Lexa’s shirt until the Commander gets the hint and pulls it over her head, throwing it somewhere in the cave. She leans up on her hands as she looks down at Clarke, blonde hair sprayed out against the blankets like an angel. Looking into Clarke’s eyes she starts a slow grind again, pressing her crotch into Clarke’s, she watches with rapt attention as blue eyes disappears, rolling into the back of her head. “Lexa _fuck_ ” she whimpers and Lexa leans down to kiss down Clarke’s chest, pulling at the bottom of her shirt, Clarke takes the hint and sits up, pulling her shirt over her head and tossing it over with Lexa’s. She stares at Lexa as she lower reaches behind to undo the clasp on her bra, watches Lexa’s pupils dilate as she slowly slides it off her shoulders.

Clarke hears a whimper and a second later she’s flat on her back, Lexa kissing her furiously as her hands slide up the newly freed flesh of Clarke’s chest. Clarke groans as calloused hands grasp both breasts and squeeze, she arches her back towards those hands and whimpers loudly when one breast is encased in a soft, wet mouth. Lexa suckles on her nipple, running her tongue across it’s tip then sucking until Clarke is almost arched completely off the blanket. Lexa uses her other left hand to tease the other nipple to a peak then covering it with her mouth as she switches breasts.

She pulls away with a wet 'pop' and lifts her head, “Look at me Clarke.” she says as Clarke lifts her head off the blanket, panting. “Let me show you how much I missed you niron” and then she’s moving lower, taking Clarke’s pants and underwear down with her. Clarke can only watch, whimpering, as Lexa grabs her thighs, running her tongue from knee to groin, sucking the flesh into her mouth. Clarke’s mouth runs dry as she watches Lexa lift her legs and place them over her shoulders. Lexa looks up at her, a glint in her eye as she lowers her mouth to Clarke, flattening her tongue and licking in one firm strip up Clarke’s soaked lips. Clarke lets out a moan as Lexa grasps hold of her hips and pulls her harder against her roaming tongue. Clarke screams and grabs hold of tangled braids when Lexa flicks her tongue franticly over her swollen clit. She feels Lexa hum when she releases more arousal into Lexa’s open mouth. Her hips start to rock frantically as Lexa moans deeper, moving her tongue and pushing it as far inside her lover as she can reach. She laps at the abundance of wetness Clarke is leaking into her mouth and moans as Clarke pulls on her hair, writhing against her face. 

“Fuck, Lexa. Yes! Right there!” Clarke moans and Lexa’s eyes roll into the back of her head. She opens her mouth and takes in Clarke’s whole pussy, forms a vacuum with her lips and _sucks_ , flicking her tongue frantically against Clarke’s clit, Clarke only lasts a few more seconds before she’s screaming her release into the cave. Lexa moans as she feels wetness flood out of Clarke and into her mouth, she laps up ever last drop, grinding her hips against the blanket as she searches for release, before feeling a tug on her braids. She moves up, slowly, Clarke’s knees still over her shoulders and she leans down to kiss Clarke, her face wet with Clarke’s arousal. "I could never forget how good you taste." Clarke moans and licks at her mouth, her chin, sucking her own cum off Lexa’s face, and it pushes Lexa to the edge, sucking on Clarke’s tongue she pushes herself up on her hands so she can push too-tight pants and underwear down her legs. She settles her clit over Clarke’s, and braces herself with her hands on either side of Clarke’s head. Clarke’s ankles wrapped around her ears. She kisses Clarke slow and wet as she positions her clit over Clarke’s and _grinds_ , Clarke rips her lips away from Lexa’s as she moans deep and loud, the feel of Lexa on top of her, of her legs thrown over Lexa’s shoulders of the harsh pants she can feel against her cheeks as Lexa sets a strong punishing rhythm, pushing her closer and closer to the edge.

She knows Lexa is close, she can feel the rhythmic grind against her clit starting to falter. She lifts her hand to grasp the back of Lexa’s sweaty neck, feeling the scar there, and pulls their faces close, lips touching.

 “Together” she moans as Lexa grinds harder and faster, moaning as she searches for a release for both of them. “Come with me, niron” Clarke groans. The combination of Clarke’s words and the trigedaslang push Lexa over the edge, she cries out into Clarke’s mouth as she shudders, sending Clarke into an almost identical climax. Both girls whimper as they come down from their respective orgasms, twitching in each others arms. Lexa gently grasps Clarke’s legs, lowering them from her shoulders slowly. She crawls up the blonde’s sated body, lying down between sticky thighs and drops her head to Clarke’s chest as she lets the exhaustion take over. The last thing she feels before falling asleep are Clarke’s fingers running through her hair and a kiss being pressed to her head.

//

Lexa wakes on her side, to Clarke’s fingers stroking over the tattoo on her back. Pausing, she turns over to see Clarke looking down at her, head resting on her palm with tears in her eyes.

“We were like this, the day I lost you.” Clarke supplies, voice heavy in her throat. She feels Clarke’s hand against her face, stroking a trembling thumb over her lips, she grasps the hand softly, presses a kiss to her thumb.

“And we are like this now, Clarke” she whispered. “After I have returned to you.”

Clarke chokes out a laugh and leans down to seal their mouths in a soft kiss. 

This, Lexa thinks, as she feels the slide of Clarke’s lips against hers, of soft hands against her stomach, this is more than just _surviving_.  

This.

This is _living_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed it!

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first attempt at fanfiction, go easy on me!
> 
> I will post the final chapter soon!


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